Have you ever doubted God's timing--especially when it seems like all of the open doors are closing?
This is Felicia Ferguson with Christian Mix 106, helping you build faith for the journey.
In July of 2024, my 13.5 year old Frenchie, Lillie died. For three months afterward, I waited to see if I would be a furparent again or if this was to be a new season of empty nesting. This was no small consideration because from the time I was an infant, I’ve had either a dog or cat (and sometimes multiples and both) in my life. Lillie’s death opened a type of solitude that I had never before experienced.
At first, not having a furkid was incredibly freeing. I took spur-of-the-moment solo road trips without needing to consider pet-friendly hotels or pet sitters. When I was back in town, I spent hours away from my apartment because I could.
But after a couple of months, I started dreading coming home. My home was too quiet. The solitude, too much. So I began actively searching for a furchild, contacting a Frenchie rescue and having an adoption fall through. After that disappointment, I decided maybe it was time for a different dog breed altogether. I reached out to Mastiff, Boxer, and English Bulldog breeders and rescues and never heard back from any of them. Finally, I broke down tried yet another Frenchie breeder.
On their website, they showed an older female available. I thought great, maybe this is who I was waiting for. She’ll be housebroken, through the teething stage, and ready to go with me everywhere Lillie did and more. When I contacted the breeder, I was stunned that she replied within minutes.
But the news wasn’t good. The website needed updating and that female had been sold months ago. Disappointed again, I ended the conversation deciding that maybe it just wasn’t the right time for a dog at all. Too many doors seemed to be closed.
But she sent a follow-up email saying she had a litter coming. I wasn’t excited at the thought. I live on the fourth floor of my apartment building. It’s been over a decade since I had a puppy, but I remember the experience well. The housebreaking. The chewing. The crying through the night. But then she sent me photos of the parents and I fell in love and she said the magic words, her puppies are litter box trained from a few weeks old. I was sold. Said that I would love a female from the litter and then sat back to wait for their birth.
About the time she’d said they were due, I reached back out. And she said they only had boys available out of the litter—she was keeping the lone female. Disappointed by what seemed to be another no in a string of nos, I went to God. Was this litter of boys his way of telling me to wait? Or was one of these boys his plan all along? The perfect gift that I just couldn’t see right now?
She texted me photos of the three boys. Again, I looked. And again, I fell in love. So a boy it is. I picked up him at eight weeks old, and from the moment we met, Béchamel has been the perfect gift from God. Yes, he’s teething, yes, he has potty training issues, and yes, it took three nights of me sleeping on the floor next to his crate for him to stop crying all night. But we bonded instantly, and his curiosity, his playfulness, his brilliance, and his absolute love for me and mine for him outweigh everything else.
In the six months between Lillie’s death and Béchamel’s homecoming, I waited and God worked. I had to grieve a loss, experience complete freedom only to feel the emptiness in my home, and realize that God’s timing and his gift was perfect for me. Now I just need to trust that his process in other areas of my life is perfect as well. But every time I look at Béchamel I’m reminded that God is working. His plan is very good. And his timing, perfect.
This is Felicia Ferguson. Thanks for listening to Christian Mix 106.
